What would an angel say, the devil wants to know…

Fiona Apple’s Criminal – IMO: One of the sexiest songs in existence.

Caution: This post talks about sex.

I don’t know how important it is anyone in else’s life, but sex used to incredibly important in mine – like, a non-negotiable with regard to relationships. It was important that the person I was in a relationship with be on the same page as I was, so open-mindedness and frequency was important. I’ve even done the whole “friends with benefits” thing, on breaks between relationships. So imagine my surprise finding myself having waited for someone to come around for 7 years and it not happening. SEVEN. FUCKING. YEARS! (Actually not fucking, that’s part of the problem, isn’t it?)

This morning, I freaked out a bit, because I had a dream about someone really important but platonic – the second one in the last few days. A SEX DREAM. If it had only been one dream, that would have been fine, but two is getting a little worrisome. I’ve Googled it, and it really didn’t help because there are a number of variables that I could apply to this particular scenario, which changes the symbolism. Most articles only apply one at a time. I think the imposed celibacy is getting to me. After that long, wouldn’t it get to anyone?

I really don’t want to continue having these dreams, or at least, I want to switch it up to someone I don’t feel so guilty having them about, because in no way do the dreams fall into the nightmare category, if you know what I mean. (Hence, the reason for the guilt and discomfort.)

Hmmmm, so how DO I resolve this situation?

Tinder is not the answer.

-S

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